Solitude is not Loneliness.
Solitude and loneliness: Two words that I tend to use interchangeably. Of course, both mean ‘alone’ but there is a fine line in the sand between solitude and loneliness, which if understood, can change the way I live my life. Loneliness is a negative feeling; solitude is a positive feeling. When creating I eventually find myself in solitude to focus on my work.
Creativity is an act of self-expression. Solitude contributes to this purpose by providing time to go inwards. I seek out solitude as a means of removing distractions and connecting with my deeper self. This often helps me find new freedom for self-expression. A great way of clearing my mind is through meditation, which can also support difficult emotions and thoughts that may arise.
Loneliness brings restlessness. It makes my mind sprout with negativity and sadness. I feel alone, cut-off, unwanted, unnoticed, and unimportant even if I am surrounded by people. Solitude, on the other hand, is a positive feeling, which helps me to be in a state of balance. I am happy with myself and enjoy my own company. It allows me to get in touch with myself and reflect on my life.
I sometimes turn into a robot, going about things mechanically. I forget my purpose in life, and I am only concerned with making enough money to lead a comfortable life. Without realising it, I lose my inner joy, and creativity and inevitably, stop growing.
I find solitude in wild places, where I am without human obligation, and lose loneliness. My inner voice becomes audible. I feel the attraction of my most intimate sources. I respond more clearly to other lives. The more coherent I become within myself as a creature, the more fully I enter the communion of all creatures.
It is a state where I can become self-forgetful and where surprising leaps of imagination and creativity take place. Whilst allowing me to forget myself as much as my distractions, it allows me to develop a distinctive voice as a writer. That is why I go into solitude so as not to drink out of everybody’s cup.
When I am among the many, I live like everyone, and I do not think as I really should. After a time, it always seems as though I lose myself in others, so I seek solace in my man cave.
I find myself in flow when I am overtaken by huge bursts of creativity that pour out of me in such a way that when I look back, I wonder who the writer was. I find myself reaching for images, compressing emotion into language, and constructing sentences that lead one to another with ease and elegance. As I attend deeply, unaware of anything else, I make meaning.
I can do this anywhere and sometimes I do it in unexpected places. I’ve had experiences of being so far inside what I’m writing that a whole train carriage has slipped away from my immediate consciousness and I’m in danger of missing even the most familiar of stops. But to have sustained, deep periods of flow often require solitude.
Writing, at its best, is a lonely life because I do this work alone, and if I’m a good enough writer I must face eternity, or the lack of it, each day. It is not this sense of suffering whether alone or with others, but a sense of entering another state of mind. Creative work requires a loyalty as complete as the loyalty of water to the force of gravity. A person trudging through the wilderness of creation who does not know this, who does not swallow this, is lost.
There is a sense of touching the numinous when I get into the flow of writing. In A Sense of the Mysterious, there is a mixture of excitement and weightlessness, as though my head was lifting off my shoulders. A state of exhilaration that is without ego. It is a feeling of being in a round-bottomed boat on the ocean in a sudden gale. It feels like a great hand has suddenly grabbed hold of me and flung me across the water’s surface like a skimming stone.
He who does not crave that roofless place called eternity should stay at home. Such a person is perfectly worthy, useful, and even beautiful, but is not an artist. Such a person had better live with timely ambitions and finish work formed for the sparkle of the moment only. Such a person had better go off and fly an aeroplane.
It’s in my choice to be solitary that I release my judgment, open myself up to my imagination, and allow my creativity to take charge. In doing so, I open myself up to new possibilities, develop stronger problem-solving skills, and learn more deeply about myself and the world around me.
I must learn to walk into a restaurant alone. In other words, I become so comfortable with myself that I don’t tie any negative feelings to thoughts of doing things or even simply existing in solitude. This gives me the excuse to be off the grid and away from distractions. With this time, I encourage others to pursue a creative endeavour.
Loneliness and solitude are not created equal. Loneliness relates to a sense of lacking, a feeling that something is missing from my life. It doesn’t just impact my mood, but it has a negative long-term impact on my physical and mental health.
In contrast, solitude allows me to process my thoughts, explore ideas, and generate more empathy. It is chosen, it is enjoyable, and it requires strong emotional regulation. It empowers me with the opportunity to be myself, to like myself, and see the beauty and the gift in my own company.